Constable Chert seemed to reach the conclusion that he wasn't being paid to think, and this was just as well because Sergeant Colon did not believe trolls gave value for money in that department.

"Sometimes," Vetinari said testily, "it really does seem to me that the culture of cynicism in the Watch is ...is..."
"Insufficient?" said Vimes.
Despite his lack of education, Vimes has a genius for finding the right word.

The young woman stood on a corner in the Shades. Her general stance indicated that she was, in the specialized patois of the area, a lady-in-waiting. To be more precise, a lady-in-waiting for Mr Right, or at least Mr Right-Amount.
I wonder if she had a sewing-needle with her ?

"And you know what'd happen to you if the Thieves' Guild spotted you? You'd be dead in the river with no time off for good behaviour."
Nobby gives some good advice to a free-lance thief.

Of course, it was good business for a diplomat to appear stupid, right up to the moment where he'd stolen your socks, but Lady Margoletta had met some of Ankh-Morpork's finest and no one could act that well.

"My lord," Leonard almost wailed. "I really cannot guarantee that sufficiently clever people will be unable to read your messages."
"Good."
"But, my lord, they will know what you are thinking!"
Vetinari patted him on the shoulder. "No, Leonard. They will merely know what is in my messages."
'the Prince' in action.....

Vimes hated and despised the privileges of rank, but they had this to be said of them; at least they meant that you could hate and despise them in comfort.

"Here, a butcher can be hanged if his sausages are not all meat, and at that it must be from a named domestic animal, and perhaps I should add that by named I do not mean that it should have been called 'Spot' or 'Ginger'..."
Agatean restaurateurs would find lean pickings in Uberwald....

Vimes had once discussed the Ephebian idea of 'democracy' with Carrot, and had been rather interested in the idea that everyone had a vote until he found out that while he, Vimes, would have a vote, there was no way in the rules that anyone could prevent Nobby Nobbs from having one as well. Vimes could see the flaw there straight away.
I'm sure we all know at least one 'Nobby'.

"You turn up when people are possibly going to die?"
OH YES. IT'S QUITE THE NEW THING. IT'S BECAUSE OF THE UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE.
"What's that?"
I'M NOT SURE.
...so now it looks as if the only thing in life that's certain is taxes.

"Things are different here, sir," said Carrot. "It wasn't until ten years ago that they replaced trial by ordeal here with trial by lawyer, and that was only because they found that lawyers were nastier."
At least the Uberwaldians aren't cynical enough to pretend it's for the benefit of the ordinary people.